[USML Announce] In Todd Shabes Trusts: But How Much Longer?

[Brad Jansen]

"It is more obvious than ever that if the Nukes somehow beat the Angries
this season it will be because  (i)  I traded the Nukes Kevin Millwood and
(ii) the Angries gave up too early on Jon Garland and traded him for Todd
Jones," explained roto savant Jeffrey Winick.

"Todd is toast, and burnt at that.  One need only look at tonight's box
score to confirm the genius of my prior sentence.  When a guy like Joel
Zumaya dials it up at 102 MPH and strikes out an average of 4 players an
inning, you think Jim Leyland is gonna rely on Jones much longer, especially
when the Tigers are gunning for the play-offs? I think not.

"First Guardardo, then Jones.  I don't know how Shabes can make these deals
and still contend.  But enough of him.  I'd rather, much rather, give kudos
to my good friend and fierce competitor Brad Jansen, who had the foresight
if not the foreplay to acquire Zumaya and Putz for a buck each at the
auction's end game.  If that's not brilliant than I'm not a roto fantasy
baseball expert who has been published here as well as in Canada, Mexico and
certain districts in Amsterdam .  And I predict that the Rips probably will
retain more of their own auction acquisitions than the stiffs they acquired
via what Klein labels 'dump' trades.  I call it like I see it.  And I see
glory in the flames of Joel Zumaya's pitches.  Sorry, Shabes, but that's the
way it is and that's how I write the Word.  And the Word is Truth.  And the
Truth shall set you free.  Sorry--700 Club is on in the background and I get
so carried away..."
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