[USML Announce] The Conventional Winick: Rips' Reserve Roster Joy To Behold

[Brad Jansen]

>From the Winick:
   Greetings and Happy New Year.  As much as I look forward to touting my
own roster I will spend a few moments deconstructing the Rips', who, I
begrudgingly admit, trail only the Hoosier Daddies and Republicans when it
comes to exciting reservists.
   Let's start with the obvious.  On the major league level, we're looking
at pitchers Joel Zumaya ($1/y1), J.J. Putz ($1/y1) and new KC closer Octavio
Dotel ($2/y1), a formidable amount of undervalue by any calculation,
including whatever math that madman Klein uses.  Turning to the offense, the
no-brainers are Nick Markakis, acquired from the Daddies this
off-season ($5/y1), along with Howie "Carew" Kendrick ($2/y1).  And when it
comes to Magic Beans, none offer better roughage than the likes of Alex
Gordon ($2), Billy Butler ($5), Jacoby Ellsbury ($2), Adam Jones ($5),
Elijah Dukes ($5), Joaquin Arias ($2), and Ryan Sweeney ($10), top prospects
all.
   The Intrigue begins with guys like Kendry Morales ($1/y2) and Casey
Kotchman ($4/y2), one of whom is bound to grab the 1B job in LA.  And what
of Dan Johnson ($5/y2)? Will his rebound in the second-half convince the A's
to slot him at 1B for good this time?  Will the Rips roll the dice with
power hitting TEX RF Nelson Cruz ($9/y1) or speedy Shin-Soo Choo ($5/y1), or
bank on lesser risks such as Julio Lugo ($21/y2) and/or Jim Thome ($26/y1)?
And what of Shandler favorites such as Boof Bonser ($9/y1), Andy Marte
($14/y1), Tadahito Iguchi ($19/y1) and Manny Delcarmen ($5/y1)?
   There is depth of talent to field two teams, I'm afraid, and the
Riptorns' choices will have a ripple effect throughout our League, I assure
you.  Well, I'm almost done mourning Gerald Ford.  When I lift my long dark
veil I will take a close and loving look at my roster.
    That is all for now, good friends!
Jeffrey Winick
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