[USML Announce] Madam, I'm Adam: An Appreciation Of Adam Jones, By Jeffrey Horatio Winick

Brad Jansen bljansen at gmail.com
Thu Apr 16 10:59:59 EDT 2009


My Dear Owners:
    By now you have read the gushing reviews and accolades about young Adam
Jones, the incredible 10-tool OF off to a blistering start for the
Orioles--the ballplayer most touted to have a break-out year.  Well, I have
observed enough of his performance and I have measured a sufficient sample
of his growth and development over the last three seasons that I can share
quite comfortably my irrebutable conclusion that the lad is for real. He can
run, he can hit, he can excel in all 5 Roto categories; in so many words and
phrases, he can and will do it all.
    Unfortunately for the Berliners, I have adopted a strategy this year of
only trading for minor leaguers whose contracts have begun running (I do
this as a handicap, so the rest of you have some faint chance to defeat me
both next year and thereafter).  And, as you know, once I select a strategy
I stick to it, at least as long as I can justify it, because I am a roto
genius.  Nevertheless, I tip my baseball cap to Adam Jones.
   And even though I dare not make an offer for him (as if I had players
even worthy of consideration), I can enjoy His Greatness. For I have a jones
for Adam. I truly do.
   And that is all.  For now.

With warmest regards this wonderful spring morning,
I remain,
Yours forevermore,

Jeffrey H. Winick
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