[USML Announce] USML Today: Who's Up, Down and Holding Steady

[Brad Jansen]

UP....
   *Daddies*: Clement to minors and Escobar to DL,  but Chris Ray of Light
will bring in badly needed saves and Wise and Nady earn starting gigs--at
least for a few days.

   *Mighty Red Hots aka All-Beef Franks:* key trade bait not subject to
recession.  Prices continue to climb.

DOWN....

    *Berliners: *couldn't move* *trade chips Duchscherer and Sherrill before
inevitable declines, Vernon Wells already hurting, Blocker won't return
calls.

    *Bombers*: will have to wait for Price and Wieters to contribute badly
needed numbers.  Morrow sent to pen and Owens to pasture.

    *Klein 9: *weak pitching staff can't afford injured Bonderman,
ineffective "closers" Rodney and Lyon.

    *Nukes: *Percival's health reduces Wheeler's save opps, Ryan's decline
reduces his save opps.  Redmond and Perkins not best Twins to have on team.

    *Riptorns*: Lackey and Hill to DL hurt pitching cause. Can Tiger
twirlers Porcello and Perry ride to the rescue?

    *LMC:* Team's gamble on Mauer Power not paying off, and Hafner is toast.

    *AYM: *Colon. Contreras. Ka-blam.

   *Flaming Brats:* Offensive cornerstone Sheffield may not land another gig
and Span is not the Man.

HOLDING STEADY.....

*     Republicans: *   Because at the end of the day, you know he's right.
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