[USML Announce] Youk Kiddin' Me? Berliners Get Another Blast of Bad News

[Brad Jansen]

*ITEM*
BOSTON -- The Red Sox have placed third baseman Kevin
Youkilis<http://espn.go.com/mlb/player/_/id/5375/kevin-youkilis>on the
15-day disabled list because of what manager Bobby Valentine called
a lower-back strain, and promoted Will Middlebrooks from Pawtucket to take
his place.

*LOSER*
Berliners. Reduced to peddling $10 minor league pitchers for a crappy team (
*see, e.g., *T-Bone Walker, Mariners) to bolster flagging fortunes,
floundering Berliners find themselves short on offense as Youkilis fulfills
promise of an injury-plagued season, leaving *BERLINERS TO FOLLOW GINGRICH
AND BOW OUT*.

*WINNER*
Riptorns. Beantown's most exciting prospect since Ted Williams now gets to
strut his stuff as Riptorns' bey of talented youngsters hone their skills *FOR
RUN AT 2013 CROWN*.
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