[USML Announce] Notice of Hot Wax: When Rips Cry

[Brad Jansen]

Between forays with super models and tanning studios, Doug Shabelman was
able to get down to some other business, that is, the business of dealing
with the Riptorns. After a few cursory exchanges and glancing blows, the
AYM and Riptorns are pleased to announce that the Riptorns have traded
Addison Reed to the AYM for first baseman extraordinaire, Prince Fielder.

"Once the Hoosier Daddies moved Wade Davis for Grant Green, I knew I had to
move my bullpen guys quickly if I wanted to get the players I really want,"
explained Rip CEO Brad Jansen. "I intend to go into the draft with the
USML's best outfielder (Trout), best middle infielder (Kinsler) and best
corner guy (Prince). If anyone is interested in trading me the USML's best
starting pitcher, you know my name, look up the number."

AYM executive Doug Shabelman was unavailable for comment.
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