[USML Announce] USML Week In Review

[Jeffrey Winick]

No worries.  I got an advance copy prepared by your staffers.  Here's the summary:


Winick is done - his team team sucks and it's only the beginning of the pain he'll suffer for his willingness to trade me Montero when I asked for him.


The Riptorns will rule the world, just having made the single greatest trade in (wait for it) not only the history of the USML.....not only the history of rotisserie baseball....but in the history of man.  Bow in my presence.  And, no, that is not a request.


The Red Hots are of no real threat to the Riptorns because their cheap closers suck and young beans (especially those who play catcher) never really pan out - just ask me about Montero.  But he, too, will, finish ahead of the hapless Berliners.


Everyone else is irrelevant to my quest for another Riptorn championship.  Nonetheless, if any of you would like to be a part of my great campaign, you know where to find me.  I'll be happy to let you join the bandwagon by giving me some of your meager talent in exchange for the ability to know that you, too, were part of this magical season.


Brother Brad Lee Jansen



-----Original Message-----
From: Brad Jansen <bljansen at gmail.com>
To: USML Announcements <announce at usml.net>
Sent: Mon, Jun 17, 2013 10:34 am
Subject: [USML Announce] USML Week In Review


Dear kind and beloved readers:
  I ran out of the house today without printing the standings or rosters.  I will have to publish the weekly report tonight or tomorrow. I apologize for any inconveniences this may cause you.


With warm regards,
Brother Brad Lee
Staff Analyst

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