[USML Announce] USML Inspector General's Report: We Ferret Out The Truth, So You Don't Have To.....

[Brad Jansen]

*ITEM*
*
*
Berliners owner Jeffrey Winick made the following statements about
Berliners MI Jed Lowrie ($14) on or about April 17, 2013:
Jeffrey Winick
Apr 17
to USML

I’m well aware of Mr. Lowrie’s abilities.  Doubt him if you will, but the
only question about him is his health.  If he can keep it together, he’s
going to be huge for both the A’s and the Berliners.****



*FINDINGS OF THE USML INSPECTOR GENERAL: *

*    *Jed Lowrie has belted all of 3 home runs this year--the last of which
came on *April 7*.

**

   Jed Lowrie,  after amassing 15 RBI in April, has driven in all of 6 in
this merry month of May.


   Jed Lowrie has scored one run, repeat--ONE RUN-- in the month of May.


   The Berliners are in second place.


*CONCLUSIONS *

     Jed Lowrie is not keeping it together.

     Jed Lowrie is not going to be huge for the Berliners.

     The Berliners will not finish in first.

     Maicer Izturis also has 3 home runs this season.

     Maicer Izturis has hit more home runs and scored more runs than Lowrie
since May 1.

     Maicer Izturis is shorter and weighs considerably less than the plump
Lowrie.

     Maicer Izturis is on the Red Hots.

    The Red Hots will finish higher in the standings than the Berliners.
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