[USML Announce] Young Alex Says Goodbye, Mr. Mendoza, Hello Superstardom

[Andrew R. Klein]

Thanks for the update, Brad.  Ten more BA points and Gordon will match 
that bum Corey Patterson you foisted upon me last year.  Also, I think 
you should at least give equal props to King Bean, who is now a 
comfortable 25 points above the Mendoza Line in AAA.

-Andy

Brad Jansen wrote:
> Dispatch from the Winick Front:
>     Greetings, everyone.  I know there have been several rumors 
> floating about concerning my well-being and personal hygiene.  I know 
> some of you thought I was preparing for trial, but actually I just 
> needed to get away for a spell and watch some baseball on satellite TV 
> up here in Nova Scotia.  Just a chance to catch some lobsters and let 
> the hair grow on my legs for awhile.  But enough of me.
>
>     I just saw the future of baseball and its name is Alex Gordon.  
> After launching his second mammoth blast in just two days, Gordon 
> finally has risen above .200 and his fortunes and batting average will 
> continue to rise at a meteoric pace. As a fan and baseball purist, I 
> am delighted that a lad of his skill, character and basic decency will 
> soon bump Elijah Dukes off the pages of roto news.  I think all of us 
> need to remember what the Great Game is all about, and why we watch it 
> and why we play it with our kids (or, in my case, hire coaches to 
> perform such mundane tasks). Watch Alex play, and your faith will be 
> restored and your spirits renewed.  Go to a White Hen or a 7-11, 
> perhaps a Walgreens...now, right now.  Buy a pack of baseball cards, 
> stick them in your bicycle spokes, slide a glove over your handlebar 
> and meet me at the park for some pitch and hit. Be sure to notify your 
> doctor if your erection lasts over four hours.
>
> I'm gone, but not for good,
> JHW     
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