[USML Announce] Slate Article: The Poetry of Roger Clemens

[rickgam at comcast.net]

B. Lee;
     I misremembered how to do haiku.  Loads of fun, that.
  RG

 -------------- Original message ----------------------
From: <bljansen at gmail.com>
> Brad Lee Bad Finger has sent you an article from Slate Magazine
> <http://www.slate.com> .
> 
> I bet Jeffrey can write poetry this good....
> 
> 	
>  <http://letters.slate.com/W0RH020B9669EDE063B3630DEEC1A0> 
> 
> 	
> low concept
>  <http://letters.slate.com/W0RH0208EC89FCFB9593E30D20DEA0> 
> 
> The Poetry of Roger Clemens
> The Rocket's collected works.
> By Hart Seely
> Posted Friday, Feb. 15, 2008, at 3:37 PM ET
> 
> 
> 
> On Wednesday, baseball great Roger Clemens stood before the U.S.
> Congress, seeking to defend his honor and his soul. History will decide
> whether Clemens told the truth in denying a former trainer's claim that
> he had used performance-enhancing drugs.
> 
> But one point is clear: In his testimony and depositions, the Rocket has
> hurled a poetic masterpiece, with a repertoire that ranges from
> free-form verse to haiku. The poems that follow are the pitcher's exact
> words, excerpted from transcripts of Wednesday's testimony
> <http://oversight.house.gov/documents/20080214143232.pdf>  (PDF) and the
> deposition <http://assets.espn.go.com/media/pdf/080213/mlb_clemens.pdf>
> (PDF) the pitcher gave to the House Committee on Oversight and
> Government Reform earlier this month. 
> 
> "Saving the House"
> 
> It was a sports court.
> I enclosed that into a gym.
> Best investment ever, by the way.
> It's saved the house from the kids.
> 
> —Feb. 5, 2008, deposition
> 
> "Offensive Haiku"
> 
> I am offended.
> I will be honest with you. 
> I am offended.
> 
> —Feb. 5, 2008, deposition
> 
> "Ghost Andy"
> 
> He looked at me, 
> Wringing his hands, 
> White as a ghost
> 
> And asked me
> What are you going 
> To tell them?
> 
> And I told him
> I'm going out there 
> To tell the truth.
> 
> —Feb. 13, 2008, hearing
> 
> "Stop Sign"
> 
> In Boston, I know I was on prednisone.
> I remember that because actually 
> I came here to visit the White House 
> When the president was in, 
> And my head looked like a stop sign. 
> 
> —Feb. 5, 2008, deposition
> 
> "Somebody's Tried To Break My Spirit in This Room"
> 
> Somebody's tried to break my spirit in this room.
> They're not going to break my spirit. 
> I'm going to continue to go out 
> And do the things that I love to do, 
> And try and be honest and genuine 
> To every person I can be. 
> It's the way I was brought up. 
> It's what I know.
> 
> —Feb. 5, 2008, deposition
> 
> "Glute"
> 
> I have strained my glute 
> On a couple occasions. 
> I wish I could tell you 
> How many occasions.
> 
> —Feb. 5, 2008, deposition
> 
> "Me"
> 
> I have never smoked a cigarette.
> I have never smoked dope.
> I have never done cocaine. 
> I would not put anything—
> Allow anybody to put anything—
> In my body 
> That's going to be harmful to me.
> That's who I am.
> 
> —Feb. 5, 2008, deposition
> 
> "Headaches" 
> 
> Kids come to my house and work out. 
> I invite them to come work out. 
> The littler kids, 
> I try to get them to sign a waiver 
> In case a bat comes out of my hand, or a ball. 
> We've experienced that. 
> That's headaches. 
> 
> —Feb. 5, 2008, deposition
> 
> Hart Seely is the author of Mrs. Goose Goes to Washington: Nursery
> Rhymes for the Political Barnyard
> <http://www.amazon.com/Mrs-Goose-Goes-Washington-Political/dp/1416538062
> > .
> 
> Article URL: http://www.slate.com/id/2184571/
> 
> Copyright 2008 Washingtonpost.Newsweek Interactive Co. LLC
> 
> 


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