[USML Announce] K-9 Congratulates AL All-Star Starters

Brad Jansen bljansen at gmail.com
Mon Jul 4 21:58:25 EDT 2011

"Behind every beautiful thing
 There's been some kind of pain."
      Bob Dylan, *Not Dark Yet*

On Mon, Jul 4, 2011 at 11:42 AM, Andrew Klein <anrklein at yahoo.com> wrote:

> CARMEL, IN - Klein Nine ownership issued a statement today, congratulating
> six American League All-Star starters who operate under K-9-initiated
> contacts.  The players -- Adrian Gonzales, Alex Rodriguez, Jose Bautista,
> Curtis Granderson, Josh Hamilton, and David Ortiz -- were all drafted by the
> Nine between 2009-2011 at an average salary of about $18.
> Fantasy baseball magazine glamor boy, Jeff Winick, marveled at the K-9's
> drafting acumen.  "No way we'd let him into my experts' leagues," Winick
> said.  "He'd kick my and Shandler's asses."
> Beleaguered Nukes' owner, Mark Kerber, noted that the K-9 just missed
> having a seventh draftee start in the All Star game, when Russell Martin was
> edged out by Alex Avila edged in the last week of voting.  Nevertheless,
> Kerber expressed gratitude at being a beneficiary of the Nine's eye for
> talent.  "Even though Martin didn't get the start, I have to feel good about
> owning a productive catcher -- especially one that I got for that
> piece-of-crap Kevin Gregg."  Kerber paused before adding, "Klein might be
> able to draft, but he's not so hot once the trading begins."
> Brad Jansen, Mark Blocker, and Matt Wieters were not available for comment.
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