[USML Announce] K-9 Congratulates AL All-Star Starters

[Richard Robbins]

Would that make more sense if I was stoned?

Sent from my iPad.

On Jul 4, 2011, at 8:58 PM, Brad Jansen <bljansen at gmail.com> wrote:

> "Behind every beautiful thing
>  There's been some kind of pain."
>       Bob Dylan, Not Dark Yet
> 
> On Mon, Jul 4, 2011 at 11:42 AM, Andrew Klein <anrklein at yahoo.com> wrote:
> CARMEL, IN - Klein Nine ownership issued a statement today, congratulating six American League All-Star starters who operate under K-9-initiated contacts.  The players -- Adrian Gonzales, Alex Rodriguez, Jose Bautista, Curtis Granderson, Josh Hamilton, and David Ortiz -- were all drafted by the Nine between 2009-2011 at an average salary of about $18.
> 
> Fantasy baseball magazine glamor boy, Jeff Winick, marveled at the K-9's drafting acumen.  "No way we'd let him into my experts' leagues," Winick said.  "He'd kick my and Shandler's asses."
> 
> Beleaguered Nukes' owner, Mark Kerber, noted that the K-9 just missed having a seventh draftee start in the All Star game, when Russell Martin was edged out by Alex Avila edged in the last week of voting.  Nevertheless, Kerber expressed gratitude at being a beneficiary of the Nine's eye for talent.  "Even though Martin didn't get the start, I have to feel good about owning a productive catcher -- especially one that I got for that piece-of-crap Kevin Gregg."  Kerber paused before adding, "Klein might be able to draft, but he's not so hot once the trading begins."
> 
> Brad Jansen, Mark Blocker, and Matt Wieters were not available for comment.
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