I’m feeling a bit schizophrenic about my team this year: am I rebuilding or going for it? I think I should go for it. I’m keeping nine pitchers and spending more on those 5 categories than I ever have. No one can top that staff…wait till Brad Bergersen goes for $22 in the draft–then we’ll see who laughs at me, won’t we?* I can move those guys to fill whatever offensive holes I have. Yeah, I think I should finally wade into the competition and confront the likes of roto expert Jeff Winick, mountaineer Mark Blocker and the bookish Andy Klein. Maybe I’m just freaking out from worrying whether Robbins will extend Price and Santana’s contracts so far he’ll blow his salary cap. What to do? What to do?
–Bothered, Rattled, Anxious, Depraved
Jeez, have I seen those keeper lists for the Angry Young Men, Nukes, Red Hots, Berliners, Dads, Calamari, K-9 and Brats? No way can you or I beat them…and if the Bombers do decide to keep Matt Wieters then all bets are off. I think with the five-star pitching staff I will retain we should have no difficulty dumping those guys for some cheap keepers for 2012. But heck, you can’t even get a friggin’ team to trade me a top prospect for Elvis “$10 for chrissakes” Andrus let alone for Erik “$1 bargain bin” Bedard. So what–the only question I need to answer is whether you should dump after the freeze lists get submitted or hold off till next Sunday. I’m just gonna get drunk on Blood Marys next Sunday and have fun. Make sure Jeff’s office stocks celery stalks. See you there.
*Ed.’s note: the Bombers are retaining Bergesen at $4.