My Dear League Brethren:
In this game of Roto all us players have and will encounter moments that inflame our passions, spark our ire and arouse painful tinglings in our jockstraps or other favored undergarments. Do not let anger and raw emotions negate your better and positive virtues (unless your Andy, who has failed to demonstrate possession of such qualities). Our game should be one that brings us joy, whimsy and the occasional keeper, and be a respite, however trivial, from the bitter ravages of time, decay and Shabelman’s unauthorized photographs of Heidi Klum.
I encourage each of you to assume your favorite position, place fresh flowers about you, close your eyes and breath deeply. Like the kidney stones that Brother Richard regaled us about so many years ago, these negative vibrations too shall pass.
Brad Lee Baddabingafinga
P.S. As an aid to your meditation, please print the accompanying photograph and place it in a location several inches out of reach.